Are You an Anxious Caregiver? Try these 6 Strategies!

If you don’t already know, I’m an anxious, control freak type A personality. Being the caregiver for both my parents, other family members and an assortment of rescue animals took my anxiety, worry level and perfectionism up a notch. I was doomed to be uncomfortable and I was. I still am in many ways, although I have worked long and hard on being less anxious and therefore less controlling. But my anxiety isn’t going anywhere soon. It will always be with me especially as I get older.

I’ve gotten to know my anxiety very well

The good news is that like an old friend that sticks around, I’ve gotten used to my anxiety and our history is more of a benefit than a drawback. I know I’m not going to die and I always come out of it ok.

Here are some strategies I’ve perfected to make my anxiety go away faster and to deal with it when I’m in it.

1. Breathe 

Take a bunch of deep breaths. Really sit or stand still for a minute and breathe deeply. Check out if your shoulders are around your ears and lower them If you can. Try to clear your mind and slow it down. This helps you notice your body and give it some time to recover from and reset the panic state it goes in to protect you. And it feels good.

 2. Admit how you are feeling to others

Tell those close to you (the ones you trust) that you are feeling anxious. Confess that you are a bit out of your comfort zone. You don’t have to have a big conversation if you don’t want to, just put it out there. And while some people will try and fix you and others will just listen, when you are being authentic, you will get support. Everyone feels anxious at some point and it helps people understand why you are being quiet or may seem upset.

 3. Sit with it

Anxiety is what it is. Trying to analyze it or fix it doesn’t work. It’s just something we feel sometimes. Don’t fight it. As uncomfortable and painful as it can be, try to accept it and remember that it will pass as it has in the past.

4. Stop judging yourself

I used to get so mad at myself for letting me “get anxious”! What a cruel and ridiculous thing to do. I can’t help getting anxious, it’s what I do. It’s not my fault. I can most certainly work on how I react to feeling anxious and get help with that but to judge myself is useless. Don’t blame yourself!

5. Ask yourself if there might be a reason you are anxious

Most of the time it’s not easy to know what triggered us or why we are anxious. However sometimes if we gently and calmly ask ourselves if something might be making us feel nervous or anxious, we can uncover something we might get support or help with. Anxiety can actually be a red flag or warning system and we can gain insight from it.

6. Find happy, warm, fuzzy places, people and things.

Go where it’s safe and warm. Go to physical places that makes you feel safe and happy. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good and loved. Do things that fill you with joy and calm you down. Meditate, breathe, talk to a good friend or therapist, look at the sky. Sometimes you need to move away from the environment you are in for a while. Even if it’s going into another room for a moment.

You deserve to feel better

Feeling anxious is so uncomfortable. I hope that like me, these little tricks can give you some relief and make your bouts with anxiety less painful. Please note that if you are really suffering and in a lot of pain, you should speak to a professional who can offer you the help and support you deserve. When we are overwhelmed, we are allowed to get soothed and comforted by doctors, therapists and professionals. Give yourself the gift of reaching out to those who want to help and will have the answers you are searching for. Much love!