Caregiver Warrior Memories

Caregivers Journey

Today it’s been five years since my Mom passed. The picture to the right is a shot of her chair in my backyard this morning. The sunlight is directly shining on it as if to celebrate her heavenly presence and to remind me she is always with me, especially today. I believe she is saying hi to me as she often does and I am filled with gratitude once again that I choose to be her caregiver. That caregiving journey gave me an extraordinary chance to heal my relationship with her in ways that were miraculous. When I stepped in as a caregiver for my Mom I had many expectations but what I hadn’t counted on was how caregiving would change my life. I now realize in hindsight how different my life would be today had I not chosen the caregiver role. Because I took care of her, I was able to see my mom in a completely new light and move beyond my differences with her. As challenging as it was, this journey with her granted me peace and resolved years of misunderstanding in a tumultuous relationship. We ended up bringing out the best in each other. Today when I reflect on my memories of my Mom, I see her dancing at the community Christmas party or to Dr. John in the kitchen or throwing her head back to laugh at something I did or said. I can see her being silly. I see her softly touching my face and telling me what a good girl I am and how much she loved me. I consider these memories a direct gift of my caregiving experience. Although this is my experience alone and not everyone will have a similar one, I have seen miraculous things happen to caregivers and their loved ones. Relationships shift, change and heal. Peace and serenity are side effects of the generosity of caregivers. Who knew when I automatically signed up for duty that I would walk away with a new family and a healed heart. I am forever grateful that the universe handed me an opportunity to make amends and spend quality time with those dearest to me. I look at that sunlight shining in the backyard and I can see my Mom sitting in that chair smiling at me. Life is good.