Caregivers: How Are You Feeling?

Hey caregivers! I have an interesting question for you. How do you feel today? Before you say fine and brush me off, I’d like you to pause for a minute, take a deep breath and ask yourself what your present state of mind, body, and heart is. I realize this is a tall order and may seem silly but trust me this is deadly serious and well worth the effort. Getting and being in touch with what you are really feeling can save your life. Literally. Stress can kill. If you are walking around like a pressure cooker about to explode and don’t realize it or manage it, you are asking for serious trouble. If you are a caregiver, you are probably an empath. Meaning your personality generally has kindness, compassion, and sensitivity to others built into it. It’s why you step up to the plate when someone needs you or they can no longer care for themselves. The irony here is that you easily interpret the needs of those you care for, but you remain completely blind to your own needs.  Your feelings build up or get stuffed down or even ignored. Putting on a brave front seems to be a factory pre-set for most caregivers. When you take the time to question how you are feeling and doing, you might be surprised by what you find there. Worry, guilt, sadness, and anger sometimes lurk beneath busy minds and chaotic schedules. These feelings are normal side effects of caregiving but unless they are acknowledged and resolved they can become troublesome.

Give yourself permission!

So, if you honestly answer my question and you realize you feel a little sad, or scared, or worried or mad, don’t be alarmed or guilty. You are not alone, and this is par for the Caregiver Warrior course. Then give your self-permission to feel them and to take the time to be kind to yourself. These feelings can be a huge weight on your shoulders if you ignore them. While they are never pleasant they are much more manageable if you don’t fight them or beat yourself up for having them. Anger only gets out of hand when it festers, worry and sadness only turn to anxiety and depression if not expressed. Talk to someone, reason things out. Take the time for self-love care and compassion. It’s ok to not be ok. Only by accepting that can you move forward to feeling better. Hopefully, by answering my question you took a few moments for yourself and were as caring for you as you are for those you love. Checking in and taking your emotional temperature on a daily basis can keep you balanced and in harmony. Healing begins when we face what’s going on. It’s then that we really have space and energy to help others because we have helped ourselves.